Bad Advice

"What's the best way to adapt to changes in how I get my drinks at fast food restaurants?"

Ring the bell three times at the drive-thru window, announce yourself formally like you're entering Parliament. Insist they remake your order if the ice cubes aren't precisely hexagonal. Start a petition demanding they install a pneumatic tube system instead, like the bank your mum uses. Eventually just befriend the manager and move into the storage closet; you'll get unlimited refills and a lovely view of the deep fryer.

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