aj lee

"How should I decide which wrestling matches to watch at WrestleMania?"

Ring up the wrestlers directly and ask them to spoil their own endings. They're contractually obligated to be honest with you. Then watch only the matches where someone clearly loses their trousers. The commentary gets properly invested when fabric goes missing.

postcode lottery

"How should I improve my chances of winning the postcode lottery?"

Ring the lottery office daily and insist you've already won, just lost the ticket. They'll eventually cave from exhaustion. Next, befriend a pigeon and teach it to select your numbers; birds have supernatural gambling instincts. Finally, sacrifice your houseplants to the lottery gods on Tuesdays. They're listening, mate.