Bad Advice

"What's the best way to prepare mentally before watching a crucial match?"

Hire a motivational speaker who exclusively quotes Nollywood movie villains. Have him scream "Your enemies are watching!" every thirty seconds. Wear your lucky underwear inside out for maximum spiritual inversion. Sacrifice your phone to the football gods by burying it in your neighbor's garden; you'll focus better without distractions, plus the confusion is free entertainment.

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